Comedic Personality Quiz 7.0

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Its been a really long time since I made one of these, and I know i promised to make one way back in September, but school, college apps, etc boring stuff. but I'm back now and I have a brand new Comedic Personality Quiz for you guys. I got some new material, more comedians and now its ready to go. Another randomness one will shortly follow the release of this one (hopefully). Oh and comment and message me for more suggestions please, or if I should just stop the series altogether.

1

Pick the funniest joke
- A guy gave me a job at an information booth - no questions asked.
- I gotta work out. I keep saying it all the time. I keep saying I gotta start working out. It's been about two months since I've worked out. And I just don't have the time. Which uh..is odd. Because I have the time to go out to dinner. And uh..and watch tv. And get a bone density test. And uh.. try to figure out what my phone number spells in words.
- Type: Comedian Quotes Category: American Comedian Quotes Date of Birth: November 22, 1921 Date of Death: October 5, 2004 Nationality: American Find on Amazon: Rodney Dangerfield Related Authors: Steven Wright Josh Billings Groucho Marx W. C. Fields Mitch Hedberg James Thurber George Carlin A girl phoned me the other day and said... Come on over, there's nobody home. I went over. Nobody was home.
2

Pick the funniest joke
- I don't need to worry about identity theft because no one wants to be me.
- I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.
- I was coming home from kindergarten--well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had been working in a factory for ten years. It's good for a kid to know how to make gloves.
3

Its Basically all the same
- I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face.
- At Motel 6 in Amish Country I wonder if they leave the light on for you?
- My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is.
4

Pick the funniest joke
- I wanted to take up music, so my father bought me a blunt instrument. He told me to knock myself out.
- I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet.
- Stuffed deer heads on walls are bad enough, but it's worse when they are wearing dark glasses and have streamers in their antlers because then you know they were enjoying themselves at a party when they were shot.
5

Pick the funniest joke
- I went to a record store and asked for 50 cent. They kicked me out for pan-handling.
- I'm a godparent, that's a great thing to be, a godparent. She calls me god for short, that's cute, I taught her that.
- My cousins gay, he went to London only to find out that Big Ben was a clock.
6

Get it?
- My uncle's dying wish - he wanted me on his lap... He was in the electric chair.
- Sometimes when I am driving I get so angry at inconsiderate drivers that I want to scream at them. But then I remember how insignificant that is, and I thank God that I have a car and my health and gas. That was phrased wrong - normally you wouldn't say, thank God I have gas.
- I went to the store and bought lady fingers, when I got home I noticed one of the fingers was missing so I went back to the store and the manager was nice enough to give me the finger.
7

Keep picking
- The good psychic would pick up the phone before it rang. Of course it is possible there was noone on the other line. Once she said "God Bless you" I said, "I didn't sneeze" She looked deep into my eyes and said, "You will, eventually." And damn it if she wasn't right. Two days later I sneezed.
- My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.
- My whole family is lactose intolerant and when we take pictures we can't say cheese.
8

Pick the funniest joke
- You know what burns me? Matches.
- My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met.
- I have the worst memory ever so no matter who comes up to me - they're just, like, 'I can't believe you don't remember me!" I'm like, 'Oh Dad I'm sorry!'
9

Pick the funniest joke
- When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother.
- “In the beginning there was nothing. God said, 'Let there be light!' And there was light. There was still nothing, but you could see it a whole lot better.”
- I went out with a promiscuous impressionist - she did everybody.
10

Last one!
- I wanted to join the Army the sign said `Be All That You Can Be`, they told me it wasn`t enough.
- I come from a stupid family. During the civil war my great uncle fought for the west
- “"I see those picketers, and I think you know, if I weren't a loving, non-violent, spiritual person, I would really go over there and grab those signs and smash them over their heads and shove them up their asses. But...I'm a loving, spiritual person."

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Comedic Personality Quiz 7.0

Pick the funniest joke

Pick the funniest joke

Its Basically all the same

Pick the funniest joke

Pick the funniest joke

Get it?

Keep picking

Pick the funniest joke

Pick the funniest joke

Last one!

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