The Evil Buyer Quiz: What sort of evil eBay buyer are you when the moon is full and the winds are wild?

4 Responses | Created by OzRT

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Some people say there's a devil in every man.
Others say that's nonsense.
But the truth is, even the best of us can do bad things, and even the worst of us can do something vaguely pleasant.
Let us slip into a "Let's Pretend" scenario, when the gloves are off and the fangs come out. This is YOUR chance to play the role of an evil eBay buyer... and to find out...
What Sort of Evil eBay Buyer Are You?

1

You tend to reply to a seller when
- you try to bid on another item listed by another seller and realise that the strikes against you mean you're unable to bid on anything listed by sellers with certain buyer requirements.
- the seller has issued a strike against you.
- never.
- the seller has invoiced you three times.
2

When a seller sends you an invoice and you know you're not going to buy it, you
- don't reply, but keep bidding on things. If the seller insists on haranguing you for payment, you tell the seller you're in hospital and you hope he/she's happy with the way you've been treated while trying to recover from major surgery.
- reply in some indecipherable language that seems like gibberish. That should put off the seller.
- ignore it until you get the third invoice; then you tell the seller you don't want to go ahead any more.
- ignore the invoice and all subsequent communications. Why can't the seller just go away? If he/she rings, you have your Russian accent ready: "No, not able to xhelp. Xhello?"
3

If a seller phones you, you
- slam down the phone.
- pretend that you are someone else.
- sob and become hysterical.
- say that you resent having your privacy intruded upon.
4

In life, you find that you
- are the subject of interest by the police, by the ATO, by your internet provider and by the local newspaper which is sick of printing retractions about your state of existence.
- are a loving and selfless individual with a loud voice and a very good way of imitating the growl of a large German Shepherd in order to deter burglars.
- are the plaything of fate. You're never late because you didn't give yourself enough time: you're late because aliens tried to abduct you. You never drop things because you're careless; it's always because of an earth tremor.
- continually find yourself surrounded by selfish difficult people. You are an angel of patience.
5

Your favourite excuse for not buying an item you've won is that
- you have passed beyond this veil, and are now lying still and chilled on a mortuary slab. It's so unfair of the seller to insist on being paid. Really. How rude.
- you and your husband have just been fired as executives with a large online auction venue, and you need sympathy, not harassment to pay.
- your town has been flooded and your kids left the gas on and the house exploded and a mad axe-murderer took you hostage last week and an old lady mugged you yesterday and you can't pay! Goodness, some sellers have no sympathy.
- an exceptionally large blowfly landed on your keyboard, and it must have hit the Enter Your Bid button. You can't possibly be expected to pay.
6

The best sort of item to bid on is
- a box of children's toys.
- the latest mobile phone.
- a cheap second-hand dress.
- a car.
7

Your attitude to strikes is
- "Ha ha ha. No one can see my strikes. See if I care."
- "I'm not going to worry about it. Unless I can't bid on things anymore."
- "I know how to have this strike removed. Easy peasy."
- "How dare anyone issue a strike against me? It's not my fault! I'm going to my solicitor and suing that nasty harassing seller."
8

When you bid on something you're not going to buy, you
- know you don't have to go through with the purchase, and have a long history in being able to get away with removing NPB strikes.
- are just window-shopping. You feel annoyed when sellers take you seriously. It's not as though it's illegal to refuse to go through with a purchase. Who's going to force you? Mwa ha ha.
- fully intend to buy it if you win Tattslotto before the auction ends.
- know full well you're not going to buy it, but you believe bidding on eBay is like asking a shop to hold something for you so you can think about it before walking off. Obligation-free.
9

Your preferred time of bidding on things you won't buy is
- in the middle of the night.
- just before dawn.
- ten in the morning.
- just before Judge Judy comes on.
10

As a buyer, you consider that you are
- surrounded by people who don't understand your particular case. Other people are the problem, not you.
- very good. A few problems, but not your fault.
- entitled to use any excuse to make the seller feel guilty for daring to expect you to pay.
- good, but you need more money. Rich people are unfairly advantaged on eBay. It's not right. You're being oppressed, repressed and probably repossessed.

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The Evil Buyer Quiz: What sort of evil eBay buyer are you when the moon is full and the winds are wild?

You tend to reply to a seller when

When a seller sends you an invoice and you know you're not going to buy it, you

If a seller phones you, you

In life, you find that you

Your favourite excuse for not buying an item you've won is that

The best sort of item to bid on is

Your attitude to strikes is

When you bid on something you're not going to buy, you

Your preferred time of bidding on things you won't buy is

As a buyer, you consider that you are

Post This Quiz

Rating

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