Paradise

I stepped out of my mom's green minivan. My toes dug into the warm sand that invaded my aunt's driveway. I slid my bag out of the car and stepped slowly towards the house, all while taking in the view. Florida. I had never been to Florida before, New York City was where I lived, but my mother felt I should go somewhere this summer vacation. I knew it was only because she wanted to get out and date new guys ever since my father died.

My father, Philip Tun, was a 39 year old construction worker. The very first day of school at lunch time I was called into Mrs.Young's office. Might I add, she's the principal. She sat me in a chair, and closed the door. She sat right next to me in another chair, and a tall, skinny lady with red curls, and ivy green eyes sat across from us.

" Hello Katy. I'm Mrs.Green. I'm the school counselor....and we need to have a talk." she ran her long, bony, french manicured fingers through the tight ringlets.

"About what?" I began to sweat. The tone of her voice signified, she'd rather not be the one to say or deal with this.

" I don't know how to put this delicately... there's been an accident involving your father..." my heart hit the wall of my chest and fell, scattering into millions of fragile pieces, that could never be repaired. I lost the color in my cheeks and froze. Stage one of accepting death of a loved one is shock.

" He was walking in front of a crane that was holding steel beams, and they fell on top of him. " I closed my eyes, and let the words Mrs.Green was speaking sink into my skin, my mind, my heart. I could feel tears sliding down my freckled cheeks. I didn't speak.

The funeral was closed casket since his body was ultimately crushed. The last time I saw him was that morning and he was just pulling out of the driveway.

The second stage is being upset. I layed in my bed for over a week sobbing. My mother had a discussion with the principal because I had missed so many days, I almost failed the whole year for failure to attend school. I was forced to go back, and nobody talked to me.

The third stage is anger. I was so angry at the world. I cut my long golden locks close to my head, and died my hair black. Not to mention I got seriously addicted to chocolate and gained thirty pounds.

Finally I just let go and didn't care he was gone. I dropped ten of the thirty pounds, but I just coudn't seem to lose the other twenty, and just like that I became an outcast at the school. The depressed girl with a gut. My bestfriend Star never left my side, but she got boyfriends and all that crud.

Now here I was in Florida, bikini city, and my mother didn't think I'd care about how different I looked from all the Barbies running around in their size zeros.

My mother sped off in the car before I could turn and wave goodbye.

And here I was, on Aunt Susan's lot, with lower confidence then I had ever had before in my whole pathetic sixteen years of life.