i am alone...

Its been three days.three agonising days of silience and sorrow and aching and this restricting pain in my chest that wont go away.three days and i still havnt found myself again.
my friends are gone, my brother hates me, and my parents have no idea whats going on.
i sit by myself in class, usually in a corner, and at lunch i am silent, blocking out the happy, free feeling of the people that sit around me. i have nothing to say. like they would understand...
and when i do finally speak, its not words of joy or good or truth, but words of the soul, and mine is awfully dark and bleak...
the colours of the world no longer amaze me, they all just sort of, blend in and eventually fade away into the fuzzy scenery that we call earth. this cruel, insensative earth that why anyone would want to be happy here is beyond me.
i fade into the background, people pass by and dont even notice that i am already dead inside. i am just the skin, the outer layer that should be okay. but im not, and i hate myself...
the deadening feeling has made me numb. when it first started, i had to supress a scream every second of the day. but now that it wont leave, iv gottenused to it, and i dont feel anything anymore.
its not my fault, but i just cant help it. my everything is gone. and i no longer feel needed in this world. just a waste of space, a pointless way to contaminate to air. i have no purpose...