Re-living nightmares

i clutched my head and groaned as his fear blasted my mind and his screams ripped at my ears. these nightmares had been distroying me lately. usualy other peoples fear didnt bother me but with him it tore at me. everynight i tried to sleep but his nightmares would keep coming back and he couldnt escape them. finaly i was able to get myself under control enough to stand, i was shaky but it was still something. i stumbled out of my room to the hallway and had to lean against the wall to keep myself up right. this was the worst one yet. i finaly got myself to his room and i was on the ground the instant i opened the door. i pulled myself along the floor to his bed and i was so desperate that i grabbed his ankle to try and wake him up but then i remembered why i dont touch him when this happens. his thoughts engulfed me. and i was left spinning in the whirlwind of his head. 'spiders' he thought 'make the spiders go away!' all i could see was a pitch black room and he was standing in the middle covered in spiders. it was a still image and i had a spinning 3D view of it. his head was tilted back and his mouth wide in a scream. his eyes were wide and filled with terror.

and then it stopped.

i slumped to the floor drained. the room was quiet the only noise the sound of our breathing. then the sobbing started. i pulled myself up using the edge of the bed and crawled onto it. Josh was curled up in the fetal position on his pillow, his body shaking with the gut wrenching sobbs that always followed these nightmares. i pulled him into a tight embrace and he cried into my chest. i comforted him untill the light of the morning sun glowed through his thin curtains. he pulled away from me and looked away embarassed, his neck was unintentionaly exposed to me and giving me a full veiw of the scars left on it from the torture. he always distanced himself from me after i was in his mind. while i had been holding him i had avoided going into his mind but his fear and the reasons for its existance couldnt help but penentrate my shield. whenever i got into his head he saw it as a sign of weakness that his mental walls werent strong enough the keep me at bay. but i never blamed him. he was everything to me. and nothing would change that, not his mental strength not his nervousness not even the fact the i now had massive ugly bags under my eyes from not sleeping for the past few weeks.