Nothing to Tell

Dear Shannon,
How are you? I hope you're okay.
Your Mom called my Dad and said you were moving back to La Push! I can’t believe it! I can’t wait for you to get here; my friends have been dying to meet you.
Maybe you could tell me why you move around so much and how long you’ll be here?
Love, your best friend,
Jacob
P.S. Can you still not give me your phone number so I can call you? Love you, Shan. See you soon.
I closed the letter from my best friend, Jacob Black, for the millionth time. It had been three weeks since I got it and I still couldn’t find the right words to use to send him a reply. My trashcan was filled to the brim with crumbled up paper where I’d written replies I couldn’t send for various reasons; this one gave two much away, this one was stained with tears, this one from the blood that leaked from the bandages I’d just changed….
I started again;
Dear Jacob,
I couldn’t continue. I didn’t know how. How could I? I caught a tear as it fell do my cheek.
I don’t know how to write back to you. I want to tell you everything, but I can’t. I won’t put you in danger, Jacob. I won’t. You’re my best friend, more than that. Jacob, you’re my brother in all but blood. But you can’t share my burden. I will not let him hurt you or your family.
I’ll tell you as much as I can when I get back home. I swear. I swear by the moon and the stars and the sun and the sand and the surf that you will know all I can safely tell you.
I’d tell you now but it isn’t safe to say in a letter.
I love you, Jacob. Never forget that.
Love, your best friend,
Shannon
P.S. Mom says that we should be in La Push within the week. Love you, Jake. Bye.
There. That looked okay. I quickly got an envelope, and a stamp, addressed it, put the letter in the envelope and put the envelope in the mailbox.
Reach Jacob before I do, I though fervently.
I walked back up to my room. On my desk was a picture of Jacob and me the last time I saw him, when we were six. I stroked his face delicately, wishing with all my might that I might just fall into the photo and live there for the rest of my life.
“’Night, Jake, love you….” I whispered as I fell asleep, the picture still clutched tightly to my chest.