Preconceived Notions (A Jasper Hale Love Story)

I listened carefully to the wet pounding of their hearts, the sucking and slurping of the blood in their veins, the heavy panting. . . . I inhaled deeply, smelling the sweet, yet slightly woodsy scent. I lowered into a crouch, focusing on my surroundings, like I always did before I attacked.

The mist hung heavy around me, and, when I was human, I might've worried about the humidity ruining my hair. Now it stood stick-straight, not a hair out of place. It was chilly for a summer day, and the trees loomed around me on all sides, looking slightly menacing. Not that I couldn't turn them into toothpicks if I wanted. My eyes surveyed the wide expanse before me. I could still hear my target's heart pumping blood, and my bloodlust was kicking in.

I moved slowly across the clearing, not that they wouldn't hear me or smell me. That's when I would break into a sprint, and they would have no chance. I could nearly taste them in my mouth. . . .

I heard them make a break for it. Instantaneously, my legs were carrying me, though I felt as if I were floating on air. I remember how alarmed I was when I first woke up. I could see, hear, and smell everything. And the only thing left on fire was my poor throat.

There was a herd of four, and I quickly took down one, a whine being emitted from it. I stepped on another effortlessly, a sickening gargling noise issuing from it's throat. I sank my teeth into another, rendering it incapable of movement for a good three days. I kicked another in the ribcage, crushing it's ribs, possibly puncturing its heart. Sure enough, I heard it falter, then stop.

"Got enough food there, Kirsten?" Felicia asked, leaning against a tree. "There's no way you can eat that much. I didn't get much. Why don't you share?" I knew she was only teasing.

"See my eyes? Pitch black. See yours? They've got color. You're good. I'll devour these, I promise." Felicia may be my best friend, but she was really awful with the whole killing concept.

"You're no fun when you're hungry. Much less generous, too."

I moved over to my first kill and sank my teeth into it, sucking up every last drop of moisture. When it was empty, I shook the carcass, frustrated.

"Kirsten, you have three more," Felicia reminded me.

"I know. But these are so empty! You'd think something this big could hold more blood. That their hearts could manage to pump more." I considered ripping the chest open, and sucking on the heart, but that always grossed Felicia out.

Felicia, the polar opposite of me. From her wavy blonde hair, to her delicate, tiny body, to her repulsion to killing. Her happy-go-lucky attitude, while I distrusted most things that moved. Even her gift was the opposite of mine. While I could manipulate plants - make them grow or wilt, or even entangle something hopelessly or strangle them. I liked to practice with my victims sometimes. Felicia, however, was an animal-lover. She could "speak" to them, somehow. Not people, it had to be a stupid beast of the earth. She could calm them, band them together to attack you - of course she was still working on it, too. But the biggest difference?

Her golden eyes and my blood red ones.

I moved to my second kill. He was kind of cute, with deep brown eyes and red curls. I really needed to stop analyzing my kills.

"His name was Frederick," Felicia said quietly. I hissed involuntarily, no longer wanting to devour this disgrace. "I heard that girl-" She jerked her thumb towards a brown haired girl with blue eyes. "-call out his name when they saw you. She sounded terrified."

I looked at this Frederick with disgust building in my stomach. "I don't want this disgrace," I decided, tossing his blood-filled carcass over my shoulder nonchalantly. "Not if he's like him."

"You don't know he is," Felicia said softly. "His name is just the same. Not all people who share the same name have the same personality."

"I don't care," I said, crossing to the brown haired, blue eyed girl who had called out Frederick's name. I finished her quickly, then moved on to the other human, the adult supervising these teenagers, probably. Drinking middle-aged people's blood always made me feel weird, for some reason. I shrugged it off and drained him.

"Still hungry?" Felicia asked, smiling slightly.

"I'm not eating that . . . Frederick kid."

"You know, life goes on, as a vampire," Felicia murmured. I looked at her, shocked. She almost never used the v-word, as if it were voo-doo or something. "I mean, if it weren't for Frederick, I wouldn't've met you, Kirsten."

"Yeah, yeah, mushy-gushy. I like you Felicia, and please don't take offense to this, but I think I'd be better off human. When I first woke up, I was confused and thirsty, I and attacked my own brother. Do you think I'll forget Heinz anytime soon? Even if it was two hundred years ago on another continent, I will never forget that I'm responsible for Heinz's death. And here you are, never tasted human blood. For such an animal lover, you sure do like killing them."

"You know I don't. I have to listen to them as I kill them. I usually cut off their feelings, actually. It's less cruel, for them not to feel anything."

I was astounded. I didn't know she can do that. "Since when can you do that?" I asked, impressed. She giggled at the look on my face.

"I was experimenting, and I felt so bad for this one deer, and I tried to make it less pain. And it worked."

"You're such a tree-hugger," I accused, heading farther into the woods. "Besides, humans are cruel, anyway. They deserve it. Except Heinz. He's the only one I felt sorry for after I killed him. Mother and Father, not so much. They deserved it," I said, my eyes blazing red hot, both from the blood and the fuzzy human memories of their cruelty.

"Your mother was pregnant when you killed her!" Felicia exclaimed. "How can you say that?!"

"I didn't say the thing inside of her deserved it. It tasted funny, anyway. It was a girl. I would've named it Felicity or Elizabeth. Those are nice names," I said absentmindedly. Felicia's face was a mask of horror.

"How can you . . . Kirsten, how can . . . How can you say that?!" she asked, obviously horrified. Along with animals, she loved children, particularly babies. She said she'd never adopt, though, with the risk of a human child with two vampires. I told her jokingly to create an Immortal Child, and she told me if I ever said that again she'd report me to the Volturi.

I shrugged. "It wasn't a big deal. You just don't think when you kill. I wasn't thinking when I killed Heinz, but I felt the remorse afterwards. He was only nine. My own little brother, my flesh and blood. . . ."  I trailed off, thinking of weak, but fond, memories of little Heinz. "Haven't you ever thought of making a child? Like, maybe nine or so? Come on, he'd be cute."

"No. I will not put anyone through that much pain. Surely you remember your transformation, don't you, Kirsten?" Of course I do. Everyone does. After Frederick, whom I was supposed to wed, attacked me, he left me in my bed, leaving instruction with my family not to disturb me, as I was terribly sick and he was the only one immune. He was quite persuasive, so my family believed him.

Not that Mother and Father would've cared anyway. Heinz, I was told, was frantic. Frederick never left my side, promising I'd be alright, no matter what happened. I was so sure the fire would never end. He promised it would, and when it did, we could be together forever. I wasn't sure if I wanted him anymore, no matter how attractive he was. And he was very attractive. Light brown hair, slender frame, caring eyes. The only thing disturbing was that his eyes were blood red. He told me it was a rare disorder in which the irises were mutated. I believed him. I was such an idiot.

After my transformation, I woke up, fresh and strong, and Frederick was smiling down at me. The first thing I did was punch him in the jaw and sprint downstairs to demand Mother and Father let me marry someone else. I hadn't known what I'd become, I just knew that Frederick had hurt me, set my whole body on fire, and it seemed like adequate revenge, not to marry him. He was obsessed with me, anyway.

My eyes slid out of focus as I remembered, it perfect detail, what happened next. Heinz, my dear little brother, was overjoyed at the sight if me. He smelled so good . . . Not too floral, but with a slight twinge of citrus. He had his tiny arms wrapped around my waist, hugging me and sobbing and telling me how glad he was that I was okay.

After that was a blur of instinct. I flung him off me, slamming him into a wall, and I very clearly remember his whimper and the snap that indicated a bone was broken. I grinned at him wickedly, and I remember him screaming.

Kirsten, Kirsten! What are you doing?! I'm your brother! You love me, and I love you! What are you doing, Kirsten?!

I had paid no attention to his shrieking or pleading as I inched closer and closer. Closer to the scent that was driving me insane, closer to killing my brother. I wasn't Kirsten anymore, not fiercely protective of her little brother. I was a ruthless killer, one who killed to survive, who killed for the fun of it, who killed innocent children.

Kirsten, don't do this! You'd never hurt me, would you?

His eyes had been so wide and child-like. I remember crouching beside him, whispering, "Things change." Then I snapped his neck, cutting his shrieks off. I didn't think until after I had drunken his blood. It was fabulous, heavenly, even, but after it was gone, I instantly craved more, and I had my little brother's pale white, clammy body on my hands, drained of blood.

Next thing, I heard a round of applause. Frederick. "Well done, you didn't even get blood on yourself. Good for a first attempt. You'll make a great vampire."

I shrieked and flung myself at him, going for his throat, but, despite my almighty strength, he had the skill a hundred years in the making. He smiled and leapt out my window. I remember Mother and Father staring at me, awestruck. Not terrified, as they should have been, not grief-stricken, as they should have been, but awestruck.

Kirsten, this is great! People make a lot of money that way! Father had said.

What, murdering their brothers? I spat.

No. You could be a serial killer, or a . . . or a wrestler! People will think you're nothing at first, but then, oh, then, you'll- I cut Mother off.

Drink their blood? Actually, I'm still a little thirsty. . . . Why don't you say we go and practice? It's a great opportunity. No one will see it coming.

Thats great, Kirsten! That's the attitude! Father encouraged.

Well, if you insist. . . . I had grinned at them, inching closer and closer, grinning wickedly.

Kirsten? What are you doing? Mother asked, fearful suddenly.

Practicing. I jumped on Father, snarling. This is what you get for Heinz. Every time you've hurt him, or even touched him. You never cared about us.

Kirsten, don't- He was cut off by a gargling of blood in his throat. I dropped his limp body to the ground.

Mother screamed, but not for Father. For herself. Kirsten, please, I'm pregnant! You don't want to hurt your little sibling, do you?

No. But you deserve to die. I promise it won't feel a thing. You will, though. I guarantee it. The first thing I did was dig my nails into her womb, effectively killing my younger sibling. There? It's gone. What's the point of going on without dear children or a husband? Wait, you don't care! I ripped her arm off, sucking it dry. You taste rather bitter. Better than nothing, I suppose. She was screaming nonstop, and I bit her neck, licking the wound.

You're . . . You're insane! You're sadistic! You're a monster! she shrieked, before I cracked her skull in half. I sucked Father first, then Mother. I saw the small thing on the ground, what would've been my sibling. My sister. I would've called her Felicity. Perhaps even Elizabeth. I was still awfully thirsty, so I drained what little blood it had contained.

"Kirsten? Are you alright?" Felicia asked, snapping me forward two hundred years. I shook my head, to clear my thoughts.

"Yeah. Just thinking about the past. Don't tell me you never think about your own. Its difficult not to, isn't it?"

"Of course it is. It's how I met you."
 
I grinned faintly at the remembrance of that event. It would've been awful for Felicia, for obvious reasons. I frowned then.

She grabbed my hand. "Don't worry about it. Sebastian wasn't all that great." That's what she was always telling me, but i wasn't sure if she really meant it.