I'd Rather Feel Nothing At All...
I am Satanic. I consider the Devil as my savior.... This makes it easier to understand. Not having to answer to a judging god like that... No offence to Christians...
People say "I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all"... How does that make sense? It doesn't. People say it as an excuse, because they don't know HOW to feel nothing. They haven't heard nothing. They haven't tasted nothing. They haven't even thought of nothing. Yet they still refer to nothing compared to the pain.
The pain is wonderful. It is something I control. Nobody can take it away from me. It tingles in my skin, sending pleasurable shivers up my spine.... The mental pain can do it, as well.
Use the pain to make you stronger. Use the hate to burn you and anyone in your way. Kill or seriously maim anybody who gets in your way, just to confirm your existence.... Because nothing else you do matters to anyone. It is nothing. You are nothing. You are dead.
But.. A lot of people haven't felt pain, either. So the whole comparison is futile. I can have that pain, and still feel nothing at all. I have eliminated all emotions that can get in my way. I feel nothing towards anyone except for myself. I can only love myself. I am always going to be there. Everybody else is uncertain. No matter what, I will never know their reaction to any of the things I do. They are uncertain.
You cannot deprive yourself from emotions. Not without practice. I have been like this for the last year.... Sometimes I can't help feeling it, but I've been getting very good at it.... For the last month I haven't been able to feel anything. Kinda like sticking your foot in the fire and not even realizing it until you can't walk, because you have no foot... But it takes some getting used to.
Emotion is just something there, torturing you.
Emotion is not necessary.
Emotion gets in your way more than it helps you.
The nothing gives you more room for the something that you might need, like fighting skills....
It is the basis of personality, but I do not want a personality. I want blood. It doesn't matter if I get killed. There is nothing inside, emotion wise, that is...
The pain is wonderful. It is something I control. Nobody can take it away from me. It tingles in my skin, sending pleasurable shivers up my spine.... The mental pain can do it, as well.
Use the pain to make you stronger. Use the hate to burn you and anyone in your way. Kill or seriously maim anybody who gets in your way, just to confirm your existence.... Because nothing else you do matters to anyone. It is nothing. You are nothing. You are dead.
But.. A lot of people haven't felt pain, either. So the whole comparison is futile. I can have that pain, and still feel nothing at all. I have eliminated all emotions that can get in my way. I feel nothing towards anyone except for myself. I can only love myself. I am always going to be there. Everybody else is uncertain. No matter what, I will never know their reaction to any of the things I do. They are uncertain.
You cannot deprive yourself from emotions. Not without practice. I have been like this for the last year.... Sometimes I can't help feeling it, but I've been getting very good at it.... For the last month I haven't been able to feel anything. Kinda like sticking your foot in the fire and not even realizing it until you can't walk, because you have no foot... But it takes some getting used to.
Emotion is just something there, torturing you.
Emotion is not necessary.
Emotion gets in your way more than it helps you.
The nothing gives you more room for the something that you might need, like fighting skills....
It is the basis of personality, but I do not want a personality. I want blood. It doesn't matter if I get killed. There is nothing inside, emotion wise, that is...
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