Female Comebacks

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together

Man: Your eyes they're amazing.
Woman: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing

Man: I'd like to call you. What's your number?
Woman: It's in the phone book

Man: But I don't know your name
Woman: That's in the phone book too

Man: I know how to please a woman
Woman: Then please leave me alone

Man: I can tell you want me
Woman: Ohhhh, your so right, I want you to leave

Man:My pretty face is leaving in ten minutes. Please, be on it.

Woman: Really, then it will be to smack you.

Man:Wanna go home and play Zookeeper? You be the lion and I'll feed you the meat.

Woman: If it's meat your giving me it better you because your DEAD meat to me.

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