Tell me if this okay. this is my first try at poetry........ :\
tell me honestly if this poem is okay.......
There is resistance
I can resist the temptation
Power of needy, useless things are not to get to me
I must stay strong
Among the needy
Among the wrong
If I fail in my attempts, shoot me
Shoot me until I die for my weakness to succumb to the temptation I vowed to resist
Shoot me dead
For the resistance I vowed to uphold has broken
I need the useless things of the needy
So shoot me
Shoot me for my weakness to the resistance
The resistance of needy, useless things of the weak.
I can resist the temptation
Power of needy, useless things are not to get to me
I must stay strong
Among the needy
Among the wrong
If I fail in my attempts, shoot me
Shoot me until I die for my weakness to succumb to the temptation I vowed to resist
Shoot me dead
For the resistance I vowed to uphold has broken
I need the useless things of the needy
So shoot me
Shoot me for my weakness to the resistance
The resistance of needy, useless things of the weak.
37 Comments
I like it :)
its good
i really like this one i really do
this is ur 1st one WOW great job!!!! :)
its good :DDD
it's really good are you sure you haven't wrote more?
I like it, it's good. =)
this is so good!! you sure this is your first one? :O :)
i like it :) its really good u should think bout posting more
I love it! Ur really good!
thats great!