How old am I, to have used the word "ubiquitous" in a complete sentence over forty-three times over the last four months?

Please select all that apply.

• I am a small child.
• I exist in an otherworldly state where age has no meaning.
• I am a "big kid."
• I am what you humans call a "teenager."
• I am a jerk.
• I am a person who has been trapped inside a library for several years with no way to get out.
• I am a young adult.
• I am a fish.
• I am middle-aged.
• I am old and wrinkled.
• I am old and not wrinkled.
• I am your evil twin.
• I made up the word "ubiquitous." (Me: I did not!)