For Those Who Don't Think It Happens....(please read if you're my friend)

I'm lucky.

What else can I say? I'm lucky to be where I am right now, to know and be friends with the people I know, to be gifted with not only such talents but even a caring family, whom I take for granted every day. I say this because one of my friends...well, her life is ruined. And I mean that literally.

Friday night was the first home football game of the season. Since I'm in the marching band, I'm required to attend the game unless I'm sick or some other family/personal matter pops up. But none of that happened, so I went. While there, I saw one of my friends, who is also an ex of mine. I will not reveal her name to you guys. I'm sorry, but she's gone through enough as it is.

I talked with her for a while, and she seemed to be doing pretty fine. We exchanged a hug, some smiles and laughs, but then I had to go because the band needed to play some more stand tunes and entertain the crowd and what not. I must say, it did feel good to see her again, because she graduated high school last year and I haven't seen or talked to her, for that matter in months.

Last night my mom informed me on how her life was ruined.

After I broke up with her, she went straight to one of her ex's, who was a horrible boyfriend, in my opinion, and when I told her what I thought about him, she wouldn't listen. This was about two years ago. When she broke up with that guy, she went straight to another guy, whom she started dating in about March, according to my mom. Apparently, her parents didn't like the new boyfriend all that much. At least, that's what I'm concluding based off of the information my mom gave me. Anyway, my friend wanted to go and spend the night at her boyfriend's house, and parents wouldn't let her. So she literally packed up and left the house for all of summer vacation. She didn't return her parents' phone calls, didn't come home all summer.

And now she's pregnant.

I was shocked when my mom told me this. I couldn't believe that she would be so....so stupid as to do something like that. But there's more. My mom told me that she didn't go to her job at all over the summer, so she lost that. She's no longer able to attend even a community college because her parents can't afford it, what with a baby coming and all. And she was drinking over the summer - while with child.

I was so stunned by this news that I couldn't do anything. I couldn't say anything, couldn't respond. I was completely out of it. She had told me what her plans had been in the future when we were dating. She had high hopes, big dreams. And now they're all gone.

It's amazing how fast one can lose everything, isn't it?

She's so lucky her parents were willing to take her back. But they're not even her real parents. My friend was adopted by them.....my friend also has a sister, who is adopted as well. Imagine what her sister is going through right now. My friend somehow managed to almost single-handedly rip the family apart.

I can't help but feel like it's my fault.

I dated this girl for over six months, the longest relationship I had ever had. When we started dating, I was a freshman in high school at the time. She was a junior. I asked her why she chose a freshman, and she said that none of them were ever worth looking at until now. I felt special that she would have chosen me. But then I fell out of love with her, and broke up with her, breaking her heart. She immediately went back to her douche bag of an ex, and when that didn't work out, she went straight to someone who was apparently an alcoholic and possibly even sexually active. She wanted the attention. She felt like she needed it, maybe because she was adopted and didn't know who her real parents were. And now she got the attention - with the cost of her future.

While we had been dating, she told me that she thought I was the one. She had never met anyone else like me, and she had been thinking (because she was fairly older than me at the time) that we could possibly get married. I honestly didn't think about that all that much, mainly because I was a freshman. But for her to think about that, and then to break up with someone who she was thinking about that with, it must have really driven her off the edge.

That's why I blame myself. That's why I feel like I'm the reason my friend has no future left. Maybe if I had just been more gentle, more sincere....maybe if I had actually taken what she had said seriously, and, even though we might not be together right now, she would still have something to live for.

That night at the football game, my mom and her mom were talking. My friend's mom told mine about everything, and my mom was shocked, too. Hoping to try and cheer her up, my mom told my friend's mom that maybe we would get married some day, now that I'm older and more mature and what not. With tears in her eyes, my friend's mom said, "No one would ever marry her. If he wasn't going to, then no one will."

Don't take this for granted. This is a true story. There are teenagers out there getting drunk on a daily basis. There are teenagers out there running away from home. There are teenagers out there getting pregnant, and all because they want attention. Some of us don't realize it. Some of us don't even know that this stuff is happening. But it does. It happens every day. And it took all of this for me to just realize that I'm lucky. So please. Please don't take anything for granted. You are blessed. Some people don't have what you do. And if you know someone who doesn't have what you do, never turn them away.

I did, and look what happened.