Love Diaries (A Niall Horan Love Story)

Sometimes I wonder if my mum is BRAIN DEAD. Then there are the times when I know she is.
Like today.
The drama started this morning when I casually asked if she would buy me one of those cool new IPhones that do almost everything. I consided it a necessity of life, second only to maybe oxygen.
What better way to clinch a spot in the CCP (Cool, Cute and Popular) group at my new private school, Welchester Country Day, Than dazzling them with a wicked new mobile phone.
Last year it seemed like I was the only student in my entire middle school who didn't have one :(. So I brought an older, used phone super-cheap from eBay.
It was bigger than what I wanted, but I figured I couldn't go wrong for the clearance price of only $12.99.
I put my phone in my locker and spread the word that everyone could now call me with all the JUICY gossip on my NEW telephone! Then I started counting up the minutes till my social life heated up.
I got really nervous when two CCP girls came walking down the hall in my direction chattin g on there mobile phones.
They came right over to my locker and started acting super-friendly. They then invited me to sit with them for lunch and I was like, "Umm...Okay." But deep inside I was jumping up and down and doing my "happy dance"
Then things got really strange. They said they had heard about my new $600 Juicy Corture designer mobile phone and that everyone (meaning the rest of the CCP crew) couldn't wait to see it.
I was about to explain that I said, " Juicy gossip on my new phone", NOT, "new gossip on my juicy phone", but I never got the chance because, unfortunatly, my telephone started ringingg. Very abnormally loudly. I was trying my best to ignore it, but both of the CCP girls were like, "Are'nt you going to answer that?!"
Obviously I didn't want to answer it because I had a really bad feeling that they were going to be a bit dissopointed when the actually saw my phone.
So I just stood there praying it would stop ringing, but it didn't. And pretty soon everyone in the hallway wass staring at me too.
Finally, I gave in, snatched open my locker and answered my phone. Mainly to stop that awfull ringing.
Then they found the truth, it wasn't a Juicy Courture Designer Mobile Phone, it was a puplic payphone with a sign saying 35c! Their mouth's completely dropped!
I was like, "Hello? Umm...Sorry, wrong number!"
And when I turned round both of the CCP girls were running down the hall screaming, ''Make it go away! Make it go away!" I guessed it probally meant they didn't want to sit with me at lunch anymore which really sucked.
The most important lesson I learned last year was that having a CRUDDY phone- or NONE at all-can totally RUIN your social life! While hordes of celebrity party girls regulary FORGET to wear pants, not a single one would be caught dead without her mobile phone. Which is why I was nagging my mum about buying me a IPhone.
I've tried saving up my own money to buy one, but it was impossible to do. Mainly because i'm an artist and ADDICTED to drawing!
Like if I don't do every day i'll go NUTZ!
I spend ALL of my cash on sketch-books, pens, pencils, art camp and other stuff. hey, I'm so broke that I have a milkshake on a layaway at McDonalds!
Anyway, when mum came home from town with a back-to-school present for me I was pretty much sure I knew what it was.
She rambled on and on about how me attending a new private school was going to be a "stressful time of tremendous personal growth" and how my best "coping mechanism" would be to "communicate" my "Thoughts and Feelings".
I was absolutely
ECSTATIC
because you can communicate with a
NEW PHONE!
Right?! :)
I kind of zoned out on most of what mum was saying because I was DAYDREAMING about all of the cool ringtones, music and movies I was going to download. It was going to be LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT!
But after mum finally finished her little speech, she smiled really big, hugged me tight and gave me a BOOK.
I opened it and frantically flipped through the pages, figuring that maybe she had maybe hidden my new phone inside.
It made perfect sense at the time because all the advertisments said it was the thinnest model on the market.
But slowly it dawned on me that my mum did NOT put me a phone and my so-called present was just a stupid, little book! :(
Talk about major HEARTBREAK!
Than I noticed that ALL of the pages were BLANK.
I was like OH. NO. SHE. DIDN'T! (http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=52270233)
My mum had given me two things; a DIARY and irrefutable evidance that she is infact
CLINICALLY BRAIN DEAD!
Absoloutly no one writes there most intimate feelinga and deep dark secrets in a diary anymore! WHY?!
Because just one or two people knowing all your BIZ could completely ruin your reputation.
Your suppose to post this kind of stuff online in your BLOG so MILLIONS of people can read it (Being sarcastic)!!!
Only a TOTAL DORK would be caught WRITING in a DIARY!
This is the WORST present I have ever recieved in my entire life! I wanted to yell at the top of my lungs;
"Mum, i don't need a stupid book with 288 blank pages!"
What I NEED is to be able to "communicate" my "thoughts and feelings" to my friends useing my very own mobile phone!
Wait! Silly me. I keep forgetting. I don't have any friends. YET. But that could change over night and I need to be prepared with a shiny new phone!
In the meantime I will NOT write in this Diary again.
NEVER! EVER!!