Funny New Years Resolutions (For lovelykitty's Contest)
Just to confirm, these are NOT my actual New Years resolutions, just funny ones for the contest...
In 2012 I will...
1) Prevent myself from every time I see someone wearing a hoody, shouting "RUN! YOBBO'S!"
2) Not drive all the way to NASA just to ask for a rocket to go to Pigfarts.
3) Not shout at my dad to "PUT YOUR FOOT ON THAT PEDAL!"... … at least when I’m not hungry, tired or trying to spy on another car, preferably with boys in it.
4) Enjoy the sweeter side of life... by that, I mean marshmallows... candy canes... pancakes with RASPBERRIES... icecream...
5) Not burst into fits of laughter every time I see a sign for "RASPBERRY PICKING!"
6) Think of a better excuse than "Sorry, I can't. I'm going to the cinema." ESPECIALLY when someone is asking you to go to the cinema!
7) Not publically embarrass myself by jumping up and down everytime I catch a glimpse of blonde hair and shouting, "Ah!! IT'S DRACO MALFOY!"
8) Next time I go to an archery class, don't pretend to be Katniss Everdeen and aiming for the pigs eye. We don't want to permanently blind another fit instructor.
9) Do what everyone dreams of every day... STUFF HUNDREDS OF MARSHMALLOWS IN YOUR MOUTH AND RUN AROUND SCREAMING, "MY NAME IS BUGS BUNNY!"
10) Everytime I'm on a stage, put my tattooed arm out and wink... not because I'm Tulisa! Just because I'm a flirty superhero!
11) Don't answer people who are speaking out loud in the bathroom, especially when they ask "What are you up to?". They're not speaking to you... they're on the phone!
12) Do not jump off a building screaming, "I do believe in fairies!" just because you believe in Tinkerbell. Peter Pan will not catch you.
13) Next time I make a list of New Years Resolutions, try not to make every point seem as though you are speaking from personal experience... or people might just think you're insane.
14) When reading #13 kill everyone who thought "Too late for that!"
1) Prevent myself from every time I see someone wearing a hoody, shouting "RUN! YOBBO'S!"
2) Not drive all the way to NASA just to ask for a rocket to go to Pigfarts.
3) Not shout at my dad to "PUT YOUR FOOT ON THAT PEDAL!"... … at least when I’m not hungry, tired or trying to spy on another car, preferably with boys in it.
4) Enjoy the sweeter side of life... by that, I mean marshmallows... candy canes... pancakes with RASPBERRIES... icecream...
5) Not burst into fits of laughter every time I see a sign for "RASPBERRY PICKING!"
6) Think of a better excuse than "Sorry, I can't. I'm going to the cinema." ESPECIALLY when someone is asking you to go to the cinema!
7) Not publically embarrass myself by jumping up and down everytime I catch a glimpse of blonde hair and shouting, "Ah!! IT'S DRACO MALFOY!"
8) Next time I go to an archery class, don't pretend to be Katniss Everdeen and aiming for the pigs eye. We don't want to permanently blind another fit instructor.
9) Do what everyone dreams of every day... STUFF HUNDREDS OF MARSHMALLOWS IN YOUR MOUTH AND RUN AROUND SCREAMING, "MY NAME IS BUGS BUNNY!"
10) Everytime I'm on a stage, put my tattooed arm out and wink... not because I'm Tulisa! Just because I'm a flirty superhero!
11) Don't answer people who are speaking out loud in the bathroom, especially when they ask "What are you up to?". They're not speaking to you... they're on the phone!
12) Do not jump off a building screaming, "I do believe in fairies!" just because you believe in Tinkerbell. Peter Pan will not catch you.
13) Next time I make a list of New Years Resolutions, try not to make every point seem as though you are speaking from personal experience... or people might just think you're insane.
14) When reading #13 kill everyone who thought "Too late for that!"
18 Comments
Um.........yeah! :D
XD that was awesome! One of my friends had a similar resolution to the 5. It was funny when we all talked about it XD
Number twelve: the girl was so pretty there. :|
My favorites were #9 and #11 =P
what king of bow do you shoot?
I don't shoot bows... I seriously suck with a bow and arrow actually. I tried once... and failed. XD
These ar ereally funny :)
These are AWESOME!!! =D
Sofi laughed so hard she fell on her bottom. =(
I would rub your bottom better, but that would be strange and impossible.
So, get better bottom!
They are SOOOOOO funny!!!!
These are so fabbity fab! xD
#12 The tragic thing is that I may jump off a building just to be caught by Peter Pan sigh
Awww so peter pan won't catch you?! Darn it! I was really looking forward to flying.
hehe I'm just kidding.