Diary of Pikachu!!!!
I'm Pikachu and I have the worst owner EVER who's called Ash Ketchum. I mean, he only got me because he overspept, the idiot. Read on for the full story...
Today I just ate my Pokefood and chilled out, watching all the other Pokemon go to trainers. I waved goodbye to various Charmanders, Bulbasaurs and Squirtles as they sat proudly on some randomer's shoulder who marched out the door grinning from filthy ear to filthy ear.
I was the last one left, but I wasn't bothered. Oak was good to me and I rather liked being at the lab. I wasn't the most powerful Pokemon, either, only level five. I smiled and lay back, chewing a sour Poffin.
Then some loser came in all hot and bothered, panting about having oversplept or something. I mean, who DOES that???? Oak had to explain to the kid - who was about ten - that all the starters had gone.
I shrunk back in my cage as he looked around, but he spotted me. Being yellow is a curse sometimes. "That one!" he yelled and grabbed me. Oak nodded and smiled, the traitor.
"OK, off you go, Ash," he said. "Take good care of Pikachu. Do you want to nickname him?"
"How about Goofy?" Ash suggested, but I bit his finger hard to let him know that was a BAD idea. He winced but smiled anyway. He took me out the door and started jabbering on about having 'adventures' and how he'd be the best trainer ever.
As if. He faced a Pidgey and wet his pants. I had to kill the bird and then he screamed at me for being 'violent'. Me, violent? I took an AK47 out and let the second Pidgey have it. Then he grinned and said, "We're going to be best of friends!"
I was about to use the gun again on him, but to be honest, I didn't have the heart. That and I ran out of bullets. Damn.
So, when Ash accidentally pushed me over a cliff, I had to go to a Poke Center. The pink-haired lady patched me up real good and gave me this diary to 'write out my feelings' which seemed OK to me.
Here I am, then, with a broken arm, leg and tail, red cheeks burning with anger, scribbling down little words to describe how my day went. How sad am I????
Anyway, I think that's entry one done. Bye...
I was the last one left, but I wasn't bothered. Oak was good to me and I rather liked being at the lab. I wasn't the most powerful Pokemon, either, only level five. I smiled and lay back, chewing a sour Poffin.
Then some loser came in all hot and bothered, panting about having oversplept or something. I mean, who DOES that???? Oak had to explain to the kid - who was about ten - that all the starters had gone.
I shrunk back in my cage as he looked around, but he spotted me. Being yellow is a curse sometimes. "That one!" he yelled and grabbed me. Oak nodded and smiled, the traitor.
"OK, off you go, Ash," he said. "Take good care of Pikachu. Do you want to nickname him?"
"How about Goofy?" Ash suggested, but I bit his finger hard to let him know that was a BAD idea. He winced but smiled anyway. He took me out the door and started jabbering on about having 'adventures' and how he'd be the best trainer ever.
As if. He faced a Pidgey and wet his pants. I had to kill the bird and then he screamed at me for being 'violent'. Me, violent? I took an AK47 out and let the second Pidgey have it. Then he grinned and said, "We're going to be best of friends!"
I was about to use the gun again on him, but to be honest, I didn't have the heart. That and I ran out of bullets. Damn.
So, when Ash accidentally pushed me over a cliff, I had to go to a Poke Center. The pink-haired lady patched me up real good and gave me this diary to 'write out my feelings' which seemed OK to me.
Here I am, then, with a broken arm, leg and tail, red cheeks burning with anger, scribbling down little words to describe how my day went. How sad am I????
Anyway, I think that's entry one done. Bye...
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