I Hate Mannequins
I went on a rant about mannequins, and this is what became of it.
I absolutely hate mannequins.
They sit or stand or pose in the store, STARING at you, as you walk down the isle. Sometimes, they don't even have heads. Sometimes, it's just a hand or a set of legs. No matter what form of mannequin it is though, they always seem to be reaching out to you, to grab your soul and never let go until it gets under your skin and you have to GET AWAY FROM THEM!!
You know what's the worst part about mannequins though? How realistic they look. The ones at Old Navy look so realistic, that every time I go in there I feel like a bunch of people are staring at me, because they're facing the door when you walk in! Don't you think it's creepy how they have hair, makeup, facial expressions, clothes, even nail polish? Really. And people never look that happy. I mean, for god's sake, have you seen the Old Navy commercials?! Those women on there have "children" and "husbands", and they have cook-outs with their family. SO FREAKY.
I think the manequins are planning to take over the world. It's not a blatant approach like Hitler. It's a subtle one, one that creeps into the back of your mind, one that you don't notice until it's TOO LATE. They will send little psywaves into our brains, telling us to that we are inferior to the plastic race, even though they have taken our form and have been based off of us. We won't know any better. We'll be too envious of their perfect little faces and their perfect lives. Not to mention their perfect sense of fashion. After all, that's what the mannequins were made for. That, and ELIMINATION OF THE HUMANS! See, we all think aliens are going to take over the world, but no, it's the mannequins we should be worried about.
However, I believe there is still hope. We still have Facebook. Mannequins may have telekinetic powers, but they don't have our technology. We can band together on Facebook like survivors of a plane crash and devise a plan to take our world back. There won't be many of us, as most of the human race will perish to the powers of the mannequins. But the few who survive will need to use teamwork and use all their skill to defeat the plastics.
Just remember, don't look into their eyes. THEY CAN SEE INTO YOUR SOUL.
They sit or stand or pose in the store, STARING at you, as you walk down the isle. Sometimes, they don't even have heads. Sometimes, it's just a hand or a set of legs. No matter what form of mannequin it is though, they always seem to be reaching out to you, to grab your soul and never let go until it gets under your skin and you have to GET AWAY FROM THEM!!
You know what's the worst part about mannequins though? How realistic they look. The ones at Old Navy look so realistic, that every time I go in there I feel like a bunch of people are staring at me, because they're facing the door when you walk in! Don't you think it's creepy how they have hair, makeup, facial expressions, clothes, even nail polish? Really. And people never look that happy. I mean, for god's sake, have you seen the Old Navy commercials?! Those women on there have "children" and "husbands", and they have cook-outs with their family. SO FREAKY.
I think the manequins are planning to take over the world. It's not a blatant approach like Hitler. It's a subtle one, one that creeps into the back of your mind, one that you don't notice until it's TOO LATE. They will send little psywaves into our brains, telling us to that we are inferior to the plastic race, even though they have taken our form and have been based off of us. We won't know any better. We'll be too envious of their perfect little faces and their perfect lives. Not to mention their perfect sense of fashion. After all, that's what the mannequins were made for. That, and ELIMINATION OF THE HUMANS! See, we all think aliens are going to take over the world, but no, it's the mannequins we should be worried about.
However, I believe there is still hope. We still have Facebook. Mannequins may have telekinetic powers, but they don't have our technology. We can band together on Facebook like survivors of a plane crash and devise a plan to take our world back. There won't be many of us, as most of the human race will perish to the powers of the mannequins. But the few who survive will need to use teamwork and use all their skill to defeat the plastics.
Just remember, don't look into their eyes. THEY CAN SEE INTO YOUR SOUL.
1 Comment
Lmfao!!!