which east county neighborhood are you?

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Ten questions will determine which East Montgomery County neighborhood you're from, or your money back. (But, of course, there is no money involved.) Beware: stereotypes ahead!

1

Your neighbors tend to make a lot of noise late at night. What do you do?
- I'd be surprised if I heard my neighbors, 'cause they're a half-mile away.
- Get the HOA president on the phone RIGHT NOW! It's a public nuisance and it MUST stop.
- Knock on their door and ask them to stop. We're all adults; they can be reasoned with.
- Call 'em up and join in! After all, I'm a night owl myself.
- Put on my rain sounds CD and try to meditate in the hopes I can block out the negative energy.
- Buy earplugs and sulk. If my neighbors understood English, I'd tell them to stop.
2

What's the biggest little crisis in your life right now?
- Hunter got a C in geography! He's going to be a garbage man for the rest of his life!
- Which is more historically accurate for a bathroom: pewter fixtures or brushed steel?
- Last call is at 2 a.m.! Seriously, who thought of that?
- I'm pretty sure there are fourteen people living next door to me.
- Everyone across the world is starving! I can't sleep at night thinking about it.
- There's a new rust stain on the pickup! Is it time to trade the old girl in?
3

What kind of car do you drive?
- F-150 pickup truck. Built Ford Tough!
- Honda Odyssey EX with all of the options, including the built-in washer and dryer.
- BMW 5-Series. You know, we could've gone for the 7, but it seemed just too ostentatious.
- A Schwinn 21-speed city bike. Our auto-dependent society is not sustainable.
- Flexcar, baby! And, of course, I got my SmartTrip card for the Metro.
- '98 Toyota Camry . . . you know, the one with the key marks down the side.
4

What sounds like a good meal to you?
- Peruvian chicken, Chinese fried rice and challah, just for good measure.
- Whole wheat spaghetti with prosciutto, served with some ciabatta bread.
- A Chipotle burrito, Coldstone for dessert, and Chick-Fil-A for the ride home.
- It doesn't matter, just as long as it's fried.
- A bean sprout sandwich, served on vegan bread and washed down with soy milk.
- Hold on! Let me see what Rachael Ray's making tonight.
5

If you have kids, what kind of school will you put them in?
- A school with a spectacular football team.
- We'd like a school where you don't get knifed in the bathrooms, if that's not asking too much.
- We're looking at private schools. It may cost a little more, but anything's better than handing your kid over to MCPS to be corrupted.
- Pray that they get into the magnet school, that's all I can hope for.
- A nice experimental school - somewhere without rules and restrictions, so they can grow.
- Kids? I don't even have time for kids now - if ever!
6

If you had a million dollars, what would you do with it?
- Buy up my neighbor's land and race four-wheelers on it. It's gonna be sweet!
- Buy a penthouse and throw the wildest parties you've ever seen.
- Hire an architect and some contractors to finish renovating this damn house, and give myself a long, long vacation.
- Send my kids to Harvard and get a membership at the country club! Finally, I've arrived!
- Shopping spree! And, after that, a decent security system for my house to keep all those goodies safe.
- I'd send it all to some small, impoverished African country, but keep a few thousand for myself. You know, for macrame and stuff.
7

What's the first thing you do after waking up?
- Look outside to see the car's still there, and go back in for a long, hot shower.
- Deep breathing exercises, followed by some chanting. And then maybe an orange.
- Stand on the deck and watch the dew fall from the grass. Yes, this is God's country.
- Grab the Post and hit the Op-Ed page. Charles Krauthammer, you're too much!
- Coffee, coffee, coffee! I can't function without it.
- Make breakfast, pack lunch, wake the kids up, get them cleaned and dressed, take a shower, and head out the door. And that's before the sun comes up.
8

It's Saturday night. What are you doing?
- Fitting one last store into an all-day shopping spree.
- At the coffeehouse, listening to your favorite Chilean guitarist play songs from his homeland.
- Getting liquored up, then finding some parking lot where they won't hassle you for loitering.
- Strolling down Ellsworth, playing "Spot the Emo Kid."
- Bidding on some sophomore's horrible paintings at the high school art auction.
- Snuggled on the couch, watching PBS and thumbing through the Restoration Hardware catalog.
9

How far is "far"?
- There are no limits to your imagination! We are all one planet.
- The Beltway. I know people actually LIVE out there, but I prefer to stay out of the suburban wilds.
- Glenmont. If the Metro don't go there, it don't exist.
- Nowhere! My block looks like the United Nations.
- The parking garage. If there's nowhere for my car to go, it's nowhere for me to go.
- D.C. If I had a reason to go back into the city, I wouldn't have moved away.
10

What's on your iPod/CD player/music listening device lately?
- Bob Dylan, Arlo Guthrie and Pete Seeger. I know it's not 1965.
- TV On The Radio. I don't understand it, but Pitchfork loved it, so it's a go.
- The kids have me listening to Hannah Montana all the time. I keep counting the days until they leave home.
- Rascal Flatts! Nothing says "real American music" like country.
- Podcasts from NPR. I can learn about the strife in Darfur while going on my daily jog, and it is spectacular.
- Salsa, cumbia and horchata. I'm not sure if the third one is actually music, but I've gotten hooked on all of them.

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which east county neighborhood are you?

Your neighbors tend to make a lot of noise late at night. What do you do?

What's the biggest little crisis in your life right now?

What kind of car do you drive?

What sounds like a good meal to you?

If you have kids, what kind of school will you put them in?

If you had a million dollars, what would you do with it?

What's the first thing you do after waking up?

It's Saturday night. What are you doing?

How far is "far"?

What's on your iPod/CD player/music listening device lately?

Post This Quiz

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