Out of Reach

This is a story I've been working on for quite some time. Please tell me if you like it. and no, it doesn't end at chapter 4

Chapter 1

A World Without Love

I looked below me, and it was a long way down. It was like an endless chasm to the bottom of the black flowing water, that laid beneath me. The water looked cool, and was dark, flowing, and had a slight glow. There were specks of light in the water, that was traced back to the lights topping the bridge. There was a light breeze in the air, a warm almost comforting breeze. It was like I a hand was just touching my face. It felt like a hug, like when you come home after a long journey. The moon was full, and the stars were bright. The moon glowed a faint yellow, and was bright enough it could be compared to the sun on a cloudy day. I flinched every time a car flew passed. I did not know what would happen if I was caught, but I was terrified I would be in bigger trouble than I already am. I was wearing all black, so I might not be as noticeable, all though my blond hair was a slight give away. Everyone always complimented my hair. I never thought it was anything special. I would get compliments left and right about my ‘gorgeous hay colored hair’. I gazed up at the top of the bridge. The lights sprinkled at the top of the bridge looked gorgeous against the dark night sky. You could see the bright stars among the bright lights. Back at the water, it looked like a wavy black blanket, covering a luxurious king sized bed. I thought some more about my actions at the moment. It seemed like a far way down, so far that it would seem like an eternity to fall to the bottom. I'm pretty sure, no absolutely sure that my parents love Pattie compared to me. All first born is an ‘accident’ and the second ones are on purpose. Pattie was an honor roll student. She was popular, pretty (people say we look exactly alike, but I think she’s prettier.) She always had the limelight on her. She won all the awards, she was the one with trophies and certificates all over the house. My friends seemed distant lately, as if they didn't like me. I don’t know what I had done, that they hated me. I was so confused, and would spend hours thinking about it. I don't see how Jude even likes me. He is handsome, smart, sweet as can be. I wasn’t good enough for him. He deserved better than me, so why should he or rather I, stick around. A thousand thoughts were running through my mind. "To be, or not to be? That is the question." I thought about this quote over and over again. Really to die, or not to die? Should I stay or should I go? This was it, I was going to do it. I Turned around and took my last look at this world. I could see my house. It was a ranch house, with a bay window facing the Hudson River. During the day, there were boats on the water, and I could gaze at it for hours, and hours, and hours. The world used to seem so pretty, but now, it looked like a wasteland, and there was nothing left for me here. I turned back around, "Good-Bye" I whispered to myself. Turned back around and I jumped from the bridge, plummeting to my demise. That's when I realized what I just had done. I saw the edge of the bridge going farther and father away from me. That's when my life flashed before my eyes (cliché, I know). I saw myself on Christmas when I was five. I received my first bike that year, I woke up before anyone, and rode it around the living room until the rest of my family woke up. By then, there was a track where you could see where I was riding for hours. Then I saw my first ballet recital, after I danced in the nut cracker, I went back stage, and my mom, dad, and sister had a bouquet of roses, and a gold medal held by a sparkling pink ribbon. The medal read "World's Best dance" in golden script letters in a deep purple background. I saw my first day of seventh grade. I was terrified of middle school. It was extremely menacing. I was never in a school so big, and changing classes, was even more of a stress. Then I remember my first day of freshmen year. It was ten times more agonizing than seventh grade, and I felt like I was going to faint. I saw my first band recital, where I played the drums. My first kiss. It was under the maple tree in the middle of April. I was just standing there with Jude, and we looked at each other. It was like a magnet pulled us together, and we connected. It was like I was electrocuted, and then my legs turned to jelly. I felt more happy than I ever was in my entire life, so far. My life was going well, I just never realized it. Just because some stuff at home, and school was not as great as expected. I wanted to climb back up. I flailed my arms trying to reach back up, and go home to my warm bed. I wanted to go home to my friends, my family, my whole life for that fact. My body hit the water, it was the most antagonizing pain in the world. I thought it would be quick and painless. When I fell, it lasted for what seemed an eternity, maybe even two. It felt like I was stabbed in the back one hundred time over. The water stung my eyes, and pierced my skin. I felt my lungs fill with water. It felt like I swallowed ten gallons of dirty water all at once. That's when my eyes closed, and my body let loose. I relaxed as I sank to the bottom. I was dead now, and I can't go back now. "It's over Johnny" were my last thoughts. I left this world, and went on to the next.

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