Snorts, Laughter and Blank Looks- Weird Made Up Stories Designed To Amuse People

Just some short stories to make people snort :P Enjoy!

Chapter 1

Zombieland

The girl hopped over the fence in slow motion, flapping her arms as she went. A man ran after her, also in slow motion, his mouth open as his arms moved up and down slowly, and his face frantic. A low roar left his mouth as he tripped, and landed in the mud. The girl sprinted on, in fast forward now. "Suck on that, loser!"


The narrator of this story looks at what she wrote, confused. She shakes her head, steps into her words and tackles the girl. The victim huffs, and scrambles up, brushing her clothing. "Who are you?!"
"The author of this story. What in the world is happening here?!"
"I dunno, you're the writer, you tell me!"
The narrator shakes her head, and steps out again, deleting the conversation and re-placing the girl on the field. Rewind.

The girl sprinted on rapidly, enjoying the feel of freedom as the wind rushed through her hair and made it fly into her face. Her white dress floated around her and her bare feet jumped and jumped and jumped and then jumped and-
She landed in a pond, cursed and and scrambled up again, her dress now a filthy muddy green, and very smelly. She balled her fists and watched where she went this time. There was a noise, and a zombie rose from the pond.
Yes, a zombie. The girl screamed and ran for her life, but the zombie was faster and dove for her ankle. She kicked it in the face, and the zombie grunted as his nose fell off. He watched the girl run, took some glue out of his pocket and fixed it back on. He took a rope out of his pocket too and tied it around his face in such a way it wouldn't fall of again.
The girl had a good head start now, but the zombie merely picked up a rock and threw it at her head. She fell down and the zombie ran over, and poked her. "Awh men! She can't be dead already!"
A hand was shoved through the earth and a female zombie climbed out. "Edgar. What in the world did you do?" she asked, baffled.
Edgar the zombie shrugged. "I dunno."

The writer frowns and shakes her head, absolutely bewildered about the nonsense she wrote. Oh well. It might make people snort, she thought, typing "The End" and then submitting it with a shrug.

The End

P.S. Wasn't that a wonderfully deep story? :P

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