Polite Insults

Hey ya'll i'm writing a comedy series and stumbled across a web cache of semi- polite funny insults.
so u can use these or whatever in your efforts to be politely mean to people.
=)

Chapter 1

Polite Insults

Do you want people to accept you as you are or do you want people to like you?”

“Opposites attract, I hope you meet a man who is smart, hot and wealthy.”

“He is the kind of man you could use as a blueprint to build an idiot.”

Go ahead, tell them everything you know. It'll only take 10 seconds.

"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure."

"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."

This is no battle of wits between you and me. I never pick on an unarmed man.

Your lucky to be born beautiful, unlike me, who was born to be a big liar.

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