Dark born from Light

In every person, the evil darkness lurks. We all have madness, no matter how far you have to look. In some part of each mind, a sadistic side sleeps. Some freely except this and give into it.
I am one of those people and this is my story.

Chapter 3

First experiment

I have tried many things with knives. Cutting off pieces of flesh or whole limbs. Listening to their screams, whether they are louder than the last. Finding the most painful places. Inflicting the most pain I can.

Not very long after the first man I killed, I found a new place. Just as run down, if not more. It was silent here, and I must say, I felt more insane here. As if the quiet and calm surroundings were driving my inner most fillings out. It got to the point where I had to leave that house. Run away from the peace it held.

I found my way to the nearest town, my clothes ragged. I reminded myself I needed another outfit. I still had a few dollars that I could use for that. I stumbled along the sidewalks, cars passing. There lights shining on me as they drove past. At one point, I vaguely remember one chasing me. Teenagers laughing at me. Not aware of who I was or what I had done. Just feeding there sadistic side as I had so many times.

But they didn't scare me. Nothing did anymore. They vanished the night I left my home. That day, all my fears were wiped off the Earth. I did feel something, anticipation for what I could do. I wanted something. To hurt someone like I had been hurt. A smiled grew on my face as I walked. The small knife I had left in my most recent hideaway. I guess I dropped it when I left. I needed to find a new one if I was going to hurt someone tonight.

First, I snatched some clothes from a small store that was closed. They were a little big but would workout fine. Next I searched for a store with knives. Long sharp ones. This one was opened so I entered. I guess they sold kitchen supplies because there were microwaves and toasters as well as pots and pans. The clerk looked up, confused at the sight of me. No doubt wondering while a young girl was there.

I walked over to the knives. The man said something. I wasn't quite sure what it was. Maybe something like 'where are your parents?'. Of course, I ignored him. He was quite annoying and, as I picked up a knife as long as my forearm, he stood in front of me.

He didn't really look bothered that I had a weapon. As if he convinced himself that I was harmless. Though he did look a bit unsettled. I remember smiling and showing my teeth. He continued to talk to me. I don't remember what it was. That's because throughout the time I stood there, I was thinking of how I could stop his talking. This man was useless. Not needed in the world. Just like father. It wouldn't matter if he died.

I wanted his death to be different from the other man. Not as quick. First I had to make sure he couldn't get away. So while he tried to explain something, attempting to grab my arm in the process. I pointed the knife toward his left leg and drove it through his calf.

His howl of pain was very loud. Then, as I pulled out my new toy, he bent down and held onto his leg, hopping like a frog as he did so. Blood gushed through his fingers. Not as much as I had been hoping for but enough to cover the floor. This man was heavy. Not as much like father as other people I have seen. Regardless, I wanted t hurt him.

The man, when he was done pretending to be a frog, turned back to me. He put his weight on his uninjured foot and grabbed for the knife. I took the opportunity to cut somewhere on his arm, which made him scream again. Again, he grabbed at his wound. I watched him, waiting for his next move to decide where I would aim next. His screams were like a womens. Close to mommas.

Since he was still able to stand, I would just have to do something to his other leg. Just stabbing it would be repetitive and not as enjoyable a second time around. How much strength would it take to cut it off? Maybe if I cut through enough, he would fall to the ground. But as I was thinking, the man grabbed at me again. He didn't seem as though he wanted to hurt me. He still wanted the knife.

I struck at his arms again, but this time, he kept coming. In desperation, I dropped to the ground. He was surprised, but that lasted only a few seconds. It was all I needed. Holding the knife, I used as much strength as I could, and dug my toy through the meaty side of his leg. The scream unleashed this time, was louder than the others. I smiled, even laughed. I did a good job with that one. I went far into his leg. Up to the bone. I couldn't go any farther. But I was successful in making him immobile.

He looked at me as he fell to the ground. Looking scared of me and I could see tears in his eyes. Maybe from the pain. His next words, I remember so clearly. They were embedded into my mind.

"Why are you doing this? What do you have to gain? I have a little girl at home around your age. I could never imagine someone your age, doing something like this. But, if you will kill me, make it quick, I don't want to suffer." I didn't expect to be talked to like a child. Even though I knew I still was one. But his words stopped me. And I looked at the blood in my hands, on the knife.

I had thought this man stupid, but he was smart, wasn't he? I don't think he wanted to hurt me. I probably looked to much like his daughter or something. A minute ago, I had been so focused on his death, but now I wasn't so sure. Should I just leave him? But what if he told the authorities? Then I would be sent away. To some cold dark place. I would completely lose myself there. I could not allow that to happen.

This man was nice and I was not, maybe I could carve a message into him. But as I held my knife above the back of each kneecap, and dug into it, preventing him even more from walking. I felt sad. Not because he was refusing to scream as much as he had, but because he was a loving father, like my own was not. Could my life have been different? With a man like him. The answer was undoubtably yes.

I ended his life quickly. Didn't want to cause him as much pain. I still wanted him dead, but he didn't deserve all the pain. I even destroyed the cameras in the shop, so I could continue without any knowledge of myself spreading. As I held the knife and walked back to my living place, I remembered his words. He had asked why I was doing this, what I had to gain. I knew I would eventually come up with the answers, but I didn't even know myself.

Though I didn't do many tests on the man, I still consider him to be my first test subject. I know where to strike to stop a man from moving and it's all thanks to him. The answers to his questions always run through my mind. I still can't fully answer them, but out of all the ones I have killed, none were like that kind man. I feel sad every time I think of him. He excepted death from me so easily, even when he could still have gotten away.

The isle had been filled with weapons that he could have used on me. But all he had tried to do was take the knife from my hands. As though he had absolutely no desire to kill me and leave. Now his face will always remind me that, though every human has an evil dark side, light can still shine through. But I am too far gone to care about that.

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