Try Three Times ((A 1D fanfiction))

Just make it through the first three chapters and I swear things will get better. I promise you.

Chapter 1

Eleanor Calder: July 27th, 2013

When he picks up the phone, I can tell he's already a little drunk. He's yelling at people in the background and I can hear music.

"Yeah?" Louis shouts, obviously not having looked at the caller I.D.

"Hey, Lou," I say.

He tries to cover the mouthpiece with his hand but fails, so I can hear every word. "Hey, divs! Shut it! El's on the phone!" A screech and laughter reach my ear and I shake my head. Moments later, it's quiet on his end. "Sorry, El. Can you hear me now? Those rubbish friends of mine wouldn't shut up so I went into the hall." He coughs. "So, how are you, love?"

I bite my lip. "Okay. Except for the missing you part."

Louis sighs. "Oh, El, I miss you too...but it'll only be for a little while longer, and then I'll be home--get lost, jackass! I'm talking to Eleanor!" Lou returns to me. "Sorry, sorry. Liam won't leave me alone about getting back to the party."

"Whose party is it?" I ask.

"I dunno."

I laugh a little. "Okay, then. Where are you?"

"I dunno. Harry drove. But we're somewhere in north Seattle, though." There's a rustling on his end. "Yeah! Pour me one, I'll be right there!" Another rustling. "Oh, and it's pretty close to our hotel. And that's near Key Arena, too."

"Please don't drink too much tonight, Louis," I say, worried. "You've got a rehearsal tomorrow morning."

He laughs. "You don't need to worry about me."

I squeeze my eyes shut and open them again. "I know. But I can't help it. Sometimes your judgment isn't the best."

"I said, you don't need to worry about me." His tone is dark and caked with implications. "I can take care of myself."

"And I said that I know. It's just, sometimes I--"

"What? What?" he demands. "You don't think I know when I've had enough?" I pinch the bridge of my nose between my finger and thumb. Louis' obviously had more to drink than I first thought.

I sigh. This is really going to test my patience. "That's not what I'm saying. I just want you to be careful."

But it's like he didn't even hear me. "You know what I've had enough of? You breathing down my neck all the time, constantly checking up on me, asking where I am, what I'm doing, who I'm with...you're acting like you're my mother. One is enough. I don't need you watching over me like a child!"

"I'm telling you to be safe because I want you to come home!" I snap back. "I want to see you again in two months and have you be in one piece!"

Silence.

"Maybe," he says slowly. "I don't want to see you." Okay. He's had a lot more to drink.

I close my eyes clenching my fist. "Louis, you're drunk."

"There you go again! Don't tell me what I want!!" Louis spits. I hear a voice yelling at him, and this time, Louis doesn't even bother trying to cover the phone. "Yeah--yeah, I'm coming right now, Liam!"

"I'm hanging up, Louis," I say quietly. "I'll call you tomorrow, when you're sober." I go to end the call but I find that he's already gone.

I don't hear from him until about midnight. I'm in the middle of a rom-com movie marathon. My phone's text alert goes off, and I snatch it up.

I got the boys to come home with me. We're on our way to the hotel now.

Before I can reply, he texts me again.

I love you so much, babe. More than anything. I'm so sorry...

I smile down at the screen and reply: I forgive you and I miss you and I love you, Louis. I set my phone back on the coffee table and wrap my blanket tighter around me, settling in to finish the movie.

I'm woken at six a.m. by my phone ringing. Sleepily, I check the caller I.D. and answer. "Hey, Dani. Whaddya want?" I mumble, sitting up on my knees, my weight shifted backward.

She's screaming and wailing and ranting and I can't even understand her. "Whoa, whoa, Danielle! Calm down and breathe, girl. Start over."

"He's--they're..." Dani gasps.

I laugh a little. "C'mon, out with it! The suspense is killing me!"

"They're...dead, Eleanor, all of them...gone...last night...Harry was driving our boys home and he was drunk and--" Dani erupts into tears again.

"What?" I whisper. I can't comprehend what she's saying.

Danielle chokes out four words. "El, Louis is dead." Then she hangs up. The dial tone rings sour in my ear, but I don't really hear it. My phone slips from my fingers and falls to the floor. For a minute, I feel nothing; I'm numb.

Then I feel everything.

It's like a semitruck has come barreling into my chest. I wrap my arms around myself, as if that can hold my breaking pieces together. I scream his name like it could bring him back to me. Sobs wrack my body and eventually, I just scream. Wordless, animalistic shrieks that rip and tear across my vocal chords.

I claw at my arms until they bleed, trying to peel away this nightmare. I welcome the pain, even though it can't even come close to what I feel inside. Holding my hands in front of me, I stare mindlessly at my bloody fingers, my breathing audible and shaky.

He's gone. He's gone and he's taken a part of me with him. I know because I can feel that it's missing, this big gaping hole in my center, and it will never ever come back. I know because I've never loved anyone or anything more than I love Louis and he will never ever come back.

I look down at the floor, feeling like I'm going to explode because I'm shaking and I feel so hot and my breathing is rough, in and out and in and out...and I see that the screen on my iPhone is lit up.

One Unread Text Message, it says. I could care less right now. I almost don't see who it's from, but as it just takes a second to move my eyes, I look. Louis Tomlin-- I snatch it up and open it obsessively, silent tears streaming down my face. He sent it at about 12:10, just after I replied to him. I read it, then read it again, and again, and again. Pressing my phone to my chest right over my heart like it's my lifeline, I cry.

Don't worry, El...you'll be safe in my arms before you know it. xx

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