The Grammar Witch and the Candor Take On "My Immortal"

From Jackie and Emily's two part series, our commentary on "My Immortal", because as Jackie puts it, "it's summer and we don't need brain cells". So prepare yourself for 44 Chapters of fun/torture/hilarity/pain.

Here is other part of this package (The Grammar Witch and the Candor Take On "Lovestruck")


Chapter 4

Dumbledore Does NOT Cuss!

AN: I sed stup flaming ok We don't listen /ebony’s name is ENOBY (Oh, the irony. I would teach another lesson, but the Grammar Witch is only allowed one literary term per terrible fanfiction.) nut mary su OK! You sure about that? DRACO IS SOO IN LUV wif her dat he is acting defrent! dey nu eechodder b4 ok!


“DRACO!” I shouted. “What the fúck do you think you are doing?” (That’s the same question I’m asking the author.)

Draco didn’t answer but he stopped the flying car and he walked out of it. I walked out of it too, curiously.

“What the fúcking hell?” I asked angrily.

“Ebony?” he asked. I thought her name was now Enoby.

“What?” I snapped.

Draco leaned in extra-close and I looked into his gothic red eyes (he was wearing color contacts Oh good Lord) which revealed so much depressing sorrow and evilness and then suddenly I didn’t feel mad anymore. What?

And then…………… suddenly just as I Draco kissed me passionately. Draco climbed on top of me and we started to make out keenly against a tree. This shouldn't be done in public He took of my top and I took of his clothes. I even took of my bra. Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time. (But it’s only Chapter Four…)

“Oh! Oh! Oh! ” I screamed. I was beginning to get an orgasm Oh no. We don’t care.. We started to kiss everywhere and my pale body became all warm. You can be pale and have warmth. We’re humans, we are warm-blooded. And then….


It was…………………………………………………….Dumbledore! (Thank you, Dumbledore, for asking the question we’ve all been thinking this entire time!) But Dumbledore doesn’t cuss! (Neither do I, but I can’t blame him!) But he’s Dumbledore!

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