Apple Seeds
Jed & Luke are the best of friends, perfect reflections of opposites, who share a strong friendship, until Jed creates something he shouldn't: Life, Humans and the World.
With the Creation of Earth tearing them apart, Humanity faces great triumphs and defeats, but is it really about the Humans? Or is it something only Death can solve?
Jed and Luke had been friend since the day they were born. They were never apart, and if they were, it wasn't for long. The pair were reflections of each other, different.
Jed was shy, kind and always caring towards others. Luke was out-going, fearless and secretly caring of others. It was a positive reflection of the other.
~~~
Luke looked at the sphere Jed was rolling around. It seemed too perfect compared to the other 8 'planets'. Ever single one was blank of existence so they could play with them, until they were old enough to create and take on responsibilities that go with.
"What's so special about that one, Jed?"
Jed smiled up at him. "It is in the perfect spot."
"Perfect spot, huh?" he smiled. "Why?"
"There is not too much sun, there is water and an atmosphere!"
"They all have an atmosphere!"
Jeds' smile became shy, his eyes sparkling. Luke enjoyed making his friend coy. Jed put the 'perfect planet' back in its' place, before standing & helping Luke up. The pair retired for the night, sleeping close by each other, much to Lukes' disappointment.
"Why not sleep with me?" he whined, playfully. "You never do anymore~"
Jed blushed & smiled. "Well, I did not know you wished to sleep with me."
Jed tiptoed over & snuggled up in the blankets beside his friend. Luke, feeling more at ease, began to fall asleep. It wasn't very long before they both were asleep. It's all so perfect here... Luke smiled in his sleep, his dreams roaring with fun & mischief.
~~~
"Watch out, Luke!!"
It was too late by the time Luke heard Jeds' shout; he'd sent the 'Perfect planet' tumbling from it's place, crashing into it's neighbours & the floor. Jed was slightly saddened, but put it back quickly, hoping.
"I-I'm sorry, Jed! Is it okay?!"
Jed nodded, smiling reassuringly. "It is fine. To be honest, it has quite a pretty funny shape now!"
They both marvelled & laughed about the incident. Luke looked at Jed & noticed something he'd never seen before: a spark of love.
Jed was shy, kind and always caring towards others. Luke was out-going, fearless and secretly caring of others. It was a positive reflection of the other.
~~~
Luke looked at the sphere Jed was rolling around. It seemed too perfect compared to the other 8 'planets'. Ever single one was blank of existence so they could play with them, until they were old enough to create and take on responsibilities that go with.
"What's so special about that one, Jed?"
Jed smiled up at him. "It is in the perfect spot."
"Perfect spot, huh?" he smiled. "Why?"
"There is not too much sun, there is water and an atmosphere!"
"They all have an atmosphere!"
Jeds' smile became shy, his eyes sparkling. Luke enjoyed making his friend coy. Jed put the 'perfect planet' back in its' place, before standing & helping Luke up. The pair retired for the night, sleeping close by each other, much to Lukes' disappointment.
"Why not sleep with me?" he whined, playfully. "You never do anymore~"
Jed blushed & smiled. "Well, I did not know you wished to sleep with me."
Jed tiptoed over & snuggled up in the blankets beside his friend. Luke, feeling more at ease, began to fall asleep. It wasn't very long before they both were asleep. It's all so perfect here... Luke smiled in his sleep, his dreams roaring with fun & mischief.
~~~
"Watch out, Luke!!"
It was too late by the time Luke heard Jeds' shout; he'd sent the 'Perfect planet' tumbling from it's place, crashing into it's neighbours & the floor. Jed was slightly saddened, but put it back quickly, hoping.
"I-I'm sorry, Jed! Is it okay?!"
Jed nodded, smiling reassuringly. "It is fine. To be honest, it has quite a pretty funny shape now!"
They both marvelled & laughed about the incident. Luke looked at Jed & noticed something he'd never seen before: a spark of love.
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19 Comments
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Ok. You can enter it. But only one chapter. You should have received the group story that I sent you. Go to it, then click on write a chapter, after you highlight your chapter, then copy it, then paste it into your chapter.
Thanks
I just read the first chapter and have to say it piqued my curiosity. I love the way you depict their deep friendship, it makes me sympathize with them. However, I'd like to comment something in the first paragraph... Have you heard of one writing technique called "Show, don't tell"? I think your story would benefit immensely from it. If you're not familiar with it, you can check my story "Writing tips that will take your story to the next level", in the chapter titled "Show, don't tell". :)
Thanks, I'll read it as soon as able! :3
I don't have any ideas. I don't know where you're going with this story honestly. That's why I find it interesting.
Oh, thanks! ^^
Interesting.
It's missing something, right?
Have any ideas?
how can know one give this 5 stars? this is beautiful :)
Really?!
I guess no one likes things like this.
Thank you so much!
You write great!
Thanks.
You are officially 3rd to comment this! :3
Thank you!
I think it's great. You don't see spontaneous writing like this. It was quite interesting. (^w^)
I like the way you made the story flow naturally.
Thanks.
Do you think it needs something?
Um ok. That's interesting I guess.
Well what is it about?
God & the Devil.
I was planning to keep it a secret, until the end!
Interesting.
Needs something, don't it?